I
woke up this morning at 8:30 am having contractions. From the start they were 5
minutes apart, and I just knew, today's the day, here we go...
My
dream was originally to have the baby at home alone with my husband Don, but
that dream got shattered to bits when
Don was killed in a car accident in June. So after two midwives offered
their services for free, I figured that was the route I would take. But I
couldn't get over my disappointment at not having the unassisted birth with DH
that I wanted, so I decided like 2 weeks ago to just try and go it alone, with
Donny watching over me from his place on the mantel.
So
this morning I'm puttering around, laying out a shower curtain on the floor
beneath the mantel, then a sheet over it, then towels and chux pads to absorb
everything. I sat on the toilet for a while and contracted there, while Catty
explored the birthing area.
Then
I decided to try laboring in the shower and rubbing my belly while I
contracted, because that helped a lot last time. Not this time. We got out of
the shower pretty quickly, and brushed our teeth and I put a diaper on Catty,
contracting all the while.
Now
it was 9:30, I'd been in labor one hour, and nothing seemed to be helping.
After my last labor which took 62 hours, I was starting to panic about how bad
the contractions were getting this early in the game. So I ate half a piece of
bread, and drank a protein shake for energy, then I struggled into my bikini
and headed outside to get the cover off the pool. I climbed into the water, and
WTF?? It was COLD!! Not relaxing at all!!
I
settled down to see what contractions in the water felt like, and the answer
was "not good". I clawed at the edge of the pool and nearly bit a hole in the
plastic. Catty climbed into the pool with me, fully dressed, diaper and all, so
I had to try to undress her and make sure she didn't drown while I kept
contracting. Ugh. Ok, pool didn't work, shower didn't work, toilet didn't work,
I was in pain, and I wanted an epidural!! NOW!!
I
managed to drag myself inside to the phone, where I called the midwife's
cellphone. She didn't answer. Panic! I called her home number, finally her son
answered and I was shouting at Catty to quit crawling all over me so she's
crying and I'm moaning and panting, and the midwife gets on the phone and hears
us, and says "I'll be right over!"
So
my plan now is for the midwife to take Catty to her babysitter's place, and
then take me to the hospital. I crawl around gathering up Catty's things, get
her dressed in dry clothes, fill up a sippy cup, all the while stopping to bend
over and howl every 3 minutes.
Then
I feel like I have to use the toilet again, so I sit there and contract, but
I'm pushing at the same time - great pressure in the butt region, like I'm
taking the world's biggest poo. I wipe with some T.P. and check, there's no poo
- something tells me to get back to my birthing area under the mantel, so I do.
It's
now 10:30, I've been in labor for 2 hours. Where's the !@?#$@( midwife??? I
kneel over my birthing area and no doubt about it, each contraction is making
me push for real. Baby on the way! Then there was a pop! and fluid gushed out
of me. I looked down, my water had broken all over the towels. It wasn't clear
fluid, but not much I could do about that now! Baby moving down inside me...
For
an instant I'm scared, as I feel the head crowning, but I shouted, "Donny, give
me strength!" and he did! Two contractions and the head was out! Then I thought
to myself, isn't this the part where the rest of it just "slips out real easy"?
But no such luck.
The
baby's head was there wiggling, I could feel it, but it wasn't just "slipping
out", he was stopping to rotate, which is normal, but I couldn't see down
there, so I started thinking he was stuck for a panicky minute or two. And it
really only was a minute before the next contraction came, and SQUIP! Out came
the baby!
And
there I was, sitting there in my living room, holding a little baby boy I had
just delivered all by myself. With Donny watching down over us, of course.
The
baby sounded like he had some fluid still in him, so I used my mouth and sucked
out his nose and mouth so he could breathe. I turned him upside down and
thumped his back, then sucked again. And viola! He said, "Waaaaahhhh!"
Catty
came running in from the TV room when she heard the squawky little cries of the
baby. She stopped in her tracks and stared. Then she said "baby! baby!" and
came running up to examine him closer. I wrapped the little guy up in a blanket
and then took some pics of Catty and the baby checking each other out, and then
the doorbell rang.
I
stuffed a towel between my legs, went to the front door, peeped my head around
at the midwife, and said, "I don't need you anymore, you can go home!" And she
was like, "well at least let me check you..." Then I threw open the door and
there's me, Catty, and Baby Donny in my arms! She nearly fell over in shock!
LOL!
So
the midwife cleaned up most of the mess and gave the baby a bath while I took a
shower. I got on the scale and I weighed 3 pounds less than my PP weight! Heh!!
Then I came downstairs and we weighed and measured the baby. I only gained 7
pounds this pregnancy, but baby Donny weighed 8 pounds, 10 oz! The same exact
weight that Catty was! (and I gained 40 pounds with her!) If this kid had been
born on his due date, or 6 days late like Catty was, I would have had the 9-lb
baby I was hoping for, darnit! Oh well, close enough, eh?
Just
like last time, I'm healthy as an ox, no complaints. No tears or any damage
down below, either. The midwife took Catty to the babysitter she uses for her
kids, and Catty will spend the day there while I get some down time. I'll go
pick Catty up tonight, I guess.
No,
I don't have anyone here with me, as we weren't expecting him until the 11th,
but I'm glad I'm all alone. It will give me some time to see whether I can
handle the newborn and Catty together by myself or not.
Right
now, I feel like a million bucks. Right now, I feel like I can take on the
world! Hell, I delivered a baby all by myself, and I feel great! Now if only
raising the baby can be as easy as having it... wish me luck - I'm gonna need
it!